Want to make an immediate impact in the way you connect with your team? Ben Whiting suggests keeping in mind a 4-to-1 ratio. 

“What science has shown is that positive and negative feedback has to be balanced, but the balance is not 1-to-1, it’s 4-to-1,” said Whiting. “If I want someone to listen to a piece of negative feedback from me—without being defensive, without placing blame on someone else, maybe even consider it and change their behavior—science has shown that person has to receive four pieces of positive feedback for every one piece of negative feedback I give them,” said Whiting, who called feedback “the oil in the engine of any organization.” 

That was among the suggestions Whiting offered in his June 8 opening keynote at Smarter Faster Payments Remote Connect 2026, “Creating a Limitless Culture: Better Results, Better Relationships, Limitless Possibilities.”

He said that “the No. 1 driver of happiness at work is having quality relationships with the people we work with and the people that we serve.”

“But we have to remember the quality of a relationship is not defined by its length; it’s defined by its depth. And the way you give a relationship depth is through trust. And you build trust through acts of vulnerability,” said Whiting, who offered an example.

“If you have a point you’re trying to make, can you make it with a story—a story that doesn’t only make your point but lets the other person know you’re considering their feelings?” asked Whiting, who used that technique throughout his keynote by sharing experiences from his 30 years performing as a magician and a mind reader.

Another way of getting vulnerability in the workplace: “Always be open to new ideas—and realize saying ‘well this is just the way things have always been here’ doesn’t help you connect with anyone.” And “be willing to admit when you do not know something. More often than not this is accompanied by an apology.”

“And last but not least, you’ve got to be willing to ask for help,” said Whiting, shooting down a common myth.

“The stigma is that asking for help is a demonstration of weakness. The reality is it’s a demonstration of our own humanity, and it makes us easier to empathize and sympathize with.”